Movies and video games make great gifts, especially at Christmas time. They are small enough to make stocking stuffers, yet big enough to place under the tree, unless you have a dog that likes to chew on plastic (James still has that copy of Austin Powers.)
But, ever since video games became a home entertainment staple back in the early 80s, game producers have made a practice of using popular movie titles and their stories to make cheap, mediocre, if not just plain horrible games designed to move units based on title alone. Let’s consider some of the worst:
E.T.(Atari 2600) - Accepted by the gaming industry as one of the worst games ever made this is one of the games that led to great video game crash of the mid 80s, The player takes on the roll of E.T. who has to find components to build a communication device to signal his people to pick him up. The engine practically made the game unplayable, you could fall into a bit without being anywhere near it, and there was no rhyme or reason to how the board was laid out. In other words, even to kids like us who played the game, it was clear that making a good game was not on the producer’s agenda.
Top Gun (NES) - Not that the game was absolutely horrible, it was just a very cheap version of “After Burner.” It could have been much better, though.
Rambo (NES) - Basically a cheap knockoff of “Zelda 2” you assume the roll of John Rambo and are given a mission…you know what, I’ll the review the movie sometime. Suffice it to say that again, the engine was horrible and pretty much made the game ten times more difficult than needed, and there is no clear path from point a to b, so you’re going to die, a lot.
The Fifth Element (PS1) - Whoever made this game either did not like, or did not even watch the movie. The cut scenes are all out of order, the voice acting that wasn’t taken directly from the movie was horrible, and the game play was nothing short of worthless. What’s sad is the movie would have made a great action game with a little effort.
Bad Boys: Miami Takedown (PS2) - Another title on many a “worst games ever” lists. The voice acting and the dialog are both insulting while the game play remains consistently crappy.
Now, this is not a one sided story. Hollywood has tried the same tactic several times to sell tickets to poor made movies due to the fact that they carry a familiar title. These include but are not limited to:
Super Mario Brothers - Bob Hoskins and John Leguizamo play the Brooklyn plumbers in this absolutely horrible film.
Street Fighter - Sadly, this was Raul Julia’s final theatrical film performance.
Mortal Kombat: Annihilation - The first MK wasn’t bad, but this movie went beyond the typical sequel inferiority.
Max Payne - The trailers made the movie look like a gothic horror film, but those of us who played the game knew the real story and were not disappointed by the plots twists, we were just disappointed by how bad the movie was.
Bloodrayne - This is one of those movies that makes me wonder if bad movies were once good before the editing process. Otherwise I would have to ask why Ben Kingsly and Michael Madsen would consent to appear in such a piece of garbage.
There are exceptions to every rule, of course. Like I said, Mortal Kombat was pretty good, and Prince of Persia was alright as well. And the Lord of the Rings films inspired a couple of good games such as “Return of the King” and “Battle for Middle Earth.” But with games today being much more cinematic, and movie fx being done more on computer, crossing the two mediums seems like a bad idea, and history has proven it so.
No comments:
Post a Comment